For everyone who has a bucket list of shit they want to do, there is another bucket list full of shit they don’t want to ever do. On the top of my ‘shit I never want to do’ was ‘go on a cruise’.  Last...

Right now in the Byron Shire there are more potholes than actual road surface. There are people from Main Arm who haven’t been sighted for weeks, suspicion being that like Alice from Wonderland, they’...

Five years ago my husband and I  built a six bedroom house. After years of stacking kids two deep per  room, we graduated from lower middle class to the ripening affluence of a family where everyone h...

Meet Barry. He likes to wank at the beach. No that’s not a typo. I didn’t mean to say walk. Walking isn’t Barry’s thing. Barry drives his car to the beach. Walking is only what Barry does to get to hi...

Tell anyone you're feeling a bit overwhelmed and you get the same response:  'you should try mindfulness'. Shit, I was hoping they'd offer to do my washing, or cook me dinner.  Was the mindfulness tre...

Like him or loathe him, Donald Trump is King of the Western World. The big orange hamster has found himself on his very own wheel of good fortune, and as Emperor of All he's fast tracking the rest o...

...profit From Her Drug Conviction But the Media Can Profit From Her In the next 6 weeks three of my daughters will be heading overseas for around 6 months each. It’s a nerve wracking time for a pa...

My neck got old. I don't know how it happened but it seems to have aged. Possibly in dog years. It doesn't make sense. I don't remember abusing my neck. Not in the way I’ve abused my liver, my arse or...

Today Ivy asked me what Botox is. She’s 8. She’d  found a humorous card on my bookshelf that depicts a 1950’s mother and daughter  with the caption ‘You’re never too young for botox!’. She wanted to k...

I hate Mothers Day... So it’s Mother’s Day. I hate Mother’s Day. I hate the picture of Motherhood that shows a nice neat Mum smiling beatifically on worming medication or holding hands with her fam...

Albert Einstein once said ‘The Definition of Insanity is repeating the same thing over and over and expecting different results.’ Sure it’s probably the most over used cliche of all time, but thats pr...

I’m imagining the song from Frozen where Elsa sings ‘Do you want to build a Snow man’. Except in my mind, its not the snow, but she’s playing in one of those play parks but the climbing frame is...

Good looking people get away with more than ugly people. It’s a fact. The only people who wouldn’t agree with this are beautiful people. But that’s because they’ve been batting their long lashes...

I did the washing. The four words you don’t want to hear from your husband. I was only gone one day. Why would he do that? After 8 years of zero masculine activity in the laundry, why would my h...

  No one likes talking about dying. Once you start talking about dying you think, shit I’m going to die now. It’s not just superstition. You will die. Not because you tempted fate by sca...

I have 132 odd socks. Each week the count goes up. I gather them in a basket in my laundry in the hope that one day they will be re-united with their lost sock mate. The basket of lost socks was...

The Power to Change The Power -Stop Adani Remember that scene in James Bond movies? 007 is in a small room filling up with water. His time is running out. The water keeps rising. The tension is unb...

Have you ever stood at a busy intersection waiting for the light to go green and been unable to cross? ‘Dam, it’s a man crossing. And I’m a lady.’ If only there were road crossings for women. Feminist...

A pair of scissors could save the world. Well not normal scissors. Gene scissors. Of course these aren’t actual scissors, you can’t Steiner your way through a felt collage with these, these are ...

Sunday Bloody Sunday Last week the Fair Work Commission ruled that Sunday and Public Holiday penalty rates will be reduced for Full time and part time workers in hospitality, retail and the fast...

Surely we have reached peak Boho. Surely this trend that kicked off in 2002 is on it’s last faded cheesecloth covered legs. If I see anymore pseudo gypsies in flowing dresses attempting to typify the ...

Having a vagina is hard work. It’s also poorly paid. If you have a vagina, and you work full time, the median wage gap compared to people without vaginas  is 21.4%. Vaginas earn less. Clearly we vagin...

If Dr Seuss was alive to day he’d be writing the product claims for hair products. Clearly where science fails, fiction takes it’s place. Like Seuss, the creative department at the hair companies seem...

Authorities are concerned that the shark netting of some north coast beaches has created a bigger environmental threat than they initially expected. With the netting of sharks, the area has experie...

Turning Motherese Every time I speak to a baby I use that stupid high pitched voice. I don’t know why. I can’t stop it. I see a baby and I start talking like a lunatic. I make my words long and dra...

You can’t live here without having a favourite beach. I love the Pass. I love the way the shore is fringed by Pandanus. The rock that we used to climb as a look out that now has an official ...

Nothing makes you feel older than going to a music festival. Earlier this week I immersed myself in a sea of side boob, front boob and under boob, at Byron’s Falls Festival. In fact I think they shoul...

When I was a kid trampolines didn’t have nets. And somehow we survived. In order to sustain a summer without broken bones you had to make sure you didn’t backflip onto the lawn onto your head. W...

It Takes Balls It’s official. The world has gone mad. According to a recent media report Australian men are flocking to get a new wrinkle reducing procedure. Scrotox. Like botox, the idea is to ...

What Happened to the Moral Compass? Once upon a time people had this thing called a ‘moral compass’. Once commonplace, in these modern times it has become a relic of the past. Something you’d find ...

Virtual Dementia You know what kind of person you are when your computer breaks. At 4.45pm last Friday my two-year-old Apple Mac decided to hold my life hostage by refusing to start. Like a cyber t...

How to Hug I saw it the other day, the Mullum hug. And it was then I realized that I hadn’t seen it for some time, not like this, not in its full 20 minutes soul to soul traffic stopping glory. I w...

Congratulations to the racists, the white supremacists, the muslim haters, the climate change deniers, the homophobes, the misogynists,  the pussy grabbers and our very good friends in the coal indust...